Rest

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Last Tuesday, I voted and thought that was gonna be the end of it... But then borderline happened...

I grew up in the area, so it's very heartbreaking to see my city in the national spotlight, and reading Twitter of friends heartbroken because they know somebody who was there, or a friend of a friend...

I thought that was it, it couldn't get worse, but then we had the wildfire...  

 For a good week, I had this in drafts, trying to figure out what to say in regards to not one, but two tragedies, thoughts and prayers? That's not good enough....

Obviously, we need gun reform. If it was me, I would ban it all so only military can use them, not even police... HOWEVER, allow them for hunting in sport (under designated zones) and have gun ranges be for rentals, so give them automatics, fuck, give people flame throwers! Anybody who had to gun, tries to look cool and take selfies, and try to look badass on YouTube... When in actuality, they look like dorks trying to do Boondock Saints fanfilms.

We need a huge surge in mental health in this country, not just with our veterans (and I think it's a disservice, especially because veterans day happened, to just throw them back into civilian life, expecting them to reassemble, it's nearly impossible) We need to make sure the vets are taken care of, as well as ourselves. There is still a stigma in this country about therapy, PTSD and depression. There is still this "men don't cry" attitude, and "facts don't care about your ffeelings" that jeopardizes the need to discuss emotions and feelings... It's these kind of people who try and act tough, who hold back, that become isolated and start to seek destruction, because that's the only "emotion" a macho dude could have, it seems... And it's not just incorrect, it's dangerous! We can all get better in this!

Finally, the wild fire, I was sleep deprived when the fire hit, and got evacuated twice. I had nowhere to go, and spent the night inside the back of the car, unsure of what would happen, conserving my energy and phone energy just to make it through... I am lucky enough to have survived, and my home in one piece, and I thank the VCFD, The Police for Crowd Control, and the Fire fighters all over this state, and across the country fighting these flames... It's really upsetting going "that's where i went to Blockbuster Video and picked up Sonic 2 for the first time" and "that's where I went to high school" and "I had a friend who lived up there!" And all these memories flashing over at once... I'm lucky, but unfortunately, others weren't. I hope their houses are rebuilt, and they have places to stay. Many animals are still sheltered, and I hope they see their families real soon. So many people wondering if it's safe to go home, and there is still uncertainty, until the winds stop.  I'm glad I made it, I just put away my duffel bag of clothes, hoping I don't get a siren and bullhorn from the police telling me to leave, as I'm in danger.

Which leaves me to, right now... I'm fine, emotionally, still a wreck, but it's a work in progress...

As we are near the end of 2018, I am trying to come up with positive things that happened for me, eventful things creatively, yeah, I did a podcast, yeah, I HAD a twitch show... but that seems to be just it. I haven't improved creatively, I'm still unsure if I'm a writer, a host, or an actor... I don't want to be a pundit, but yet, I have this idea for a YouTube show, but i don't know if it's good or not, and I'm holding off... but I feel it might be too late. I know I'm way more creative than that. But it feels, at least to me, that I'll never get there. I write here to vent, but also to get inspired... And I just hit that creative crash.

 For self care, I am just exercising a bit while watching the price is right and let's make a deal, they are both feel good shows, but i know I could be doing something, but my mind isn't going anywhere... It's a bit lost, to say the least.

And now, I found out the passing of Stan Lee. As this was almost done. I never met him. I know who he was, I know his impact. I saw the cameos. I saw him as someone even bigger than Walt Disney, a guy who was excited to talk about his characters and their adventures as he was the moral lessons involved. His passing has went waves to comic book fans all across the world, and he got to see his creations (along with Ditko and Kirby) become epic Blockbuster movies, and have llongevity and immortality... 

It's never too late, he never got his break until his 40s, and it's something to think about, rather you're a guy about to hit 30 thinking "well I sure e fucked up" or an energetic kid in their early 20s. I still think anything is possible, I still think there is hope out there, and good things can and will happen, not just to me, but to all of us, we just have to discover what they are.

I don't know what that is for me, quite yet, I still think I have talent in certain areas, but it's always very difficult to show off, let alone explain. 

But something tells me, given this economy, it's best used as "a hobby" and not something to cash on... (insert sigh here)

Maybe that's why we rest, that's why we recover, we all need breaks sometimes, to let us know we are human, and catch our breath, and try and figure out, what exactly our goals are? 

I'm still finding mine. 

I don't know what's going on.

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So, since I last updated, it was a week of just pure yuck. My computer AND my phone were factory reset. A few days between the other (note to self - just do what Kanye does and just do pin and make it 00000 next time)

 So all sorts of documents gone, it took a while, but I managed to get audacity working to edit a podcast.

Let's just say, it was frustrating. But luckily, I did save a bunch on the Google Drive and we are good to go!

I was originally gonna make a video of my new series, talking about Red Dead Redemption 2, and the 100 hour work week, and the strain it puts on developers and artists, but I think it is too late, people have the game. People like the game, what difference does it make? A video like mine in the sea of conservative vids calling people they don't like NPCs (was "cuck" too passe?) It just didn't feel right.

I was thinking if I'm gonna make these videos, even if it's just a blatant ripoff of charlie brookers  screenwipe again, I should just make it unlisted with the videos embed here. Give this place some CONTENT like all your favorite streaming services!

what have I been up to?

I played jackbox party pack 5, I think it's the best jackbox pack, so far, I love the games that are played, my favorite will always be you don't know jack.  

I am installing Soul Calibur 6 as we speak, because console gaming is somehow safe for the time being. I bet it will play "just fine" 

I cancelled VRV, but will be back with them in a few months time, I don't care much about anime, but I haven't been seeing much except talking toons on that platform. NOT EVEN FIGURE IT OUT helped me out. 

Instead I got CBS ALL ACCESS, because I'm a game show dork, and I can take The Price is Right and Let's Make a Deal with me wherever I go. So of course, I'm gonna be doing that! 

Finally, I donated to Podcast : The Ride's patreon called "The Second Gate" and it's a ton of fun, their first episode is about Disney Quest!

Other than that, Titans felt like a show that was rushed into production and at least to me, it's a hot mess, but audiences don't care as long as Dick Grayson is a cutie (he is) and they get all the fan service (FLYING GRAYSONS, Allusions to Ravens, etc.)  

I know there is an audience for this show, DC was confident to give it a second season before the pilot even launched... But looking at social media... It's not that big? It's not the size of Riverdale or even Legends of Tomorrow for that matter... Maybe they wanted to go for niche? 

I have no idea, I am trying to not hit a sad slump, one hit me Thursday/Friday and just wrecked yesterday until I was able to watch a baseball game... on television. Although I wouldn't mind an ice cream served in a baseball helmet.

 In conclusion, yeah, I just hit another speed bump, but hopefully things will be looking up soon. I have to hang on.

What now?

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so I think I jinxed myself, my last two twitch streams have been an absolute mess, it was laggy, so much latency, and then looking back, it was almost unwatchable.

 As much as I do not care about the numbers of people, I do care about quality, namely in terms of how it looks and is presented.

But because things have been getting bad, I now  no longer can stream on twitch for the time being

 This time around, it is out of my hands, I can clean the computer, defrag, but I honestly just need a new computer at this point. I enjoyed gaming on a PC, but I think it's best to stick to consoles for the time being  and might just save up for a Mac again.

 I mostly use my computer to write, edit and watch stuff. Final Cut, Final Draft and Final Fantasy 7: The Spirits Within...

 There are a few games that are PC only, but I'm not so committed to video games to care anymore... I like video games, but I mostly am just playing on switch these days.

So now, I just gotta figure out  what's next?

With no more Night Night, for the time being, I can't stream Monday or Friday... So all I have left is a podcast to edit and record. 

   What's troubling to me, is figuring out my talents, and how to do something.

I have nothing going for me "offline" (in the real world) so I had twitch for a while to keep me talking to people and make cool friends. 

But now, I dunno...  

I do NOT want to go back to YouTube.   Social media has damaged all of us. So many of us are fictional versions of ourselves with the intent to sell that image with sponsored content or get a deal with some company.

I can't fake it. I can act it, but I'm not worthy of a parasocial relationship. 

I also dislike YouTube so much, algorithms give you the shittiest people, those with big subscriber counts get treated differently than those just starting out. And even then, you have to be this fake character for the rest of your "career" doing beauty tips or unboxing videos, or eating food... That's it, that's your life now. The guy who is excited about happy meal toys. 

From conservative nihilistic Nazis who hate lgbts to "cringe compilations"  of some teenager crying because she hates bullying. The internet, to put it nicely, is garbage.

I don't know what to do next. But something tells me, as much as I dislike it, I might have to return to my roots as a Charlie Brooker knockoff.

https://youtu.be/aaVhyURSfZU

 One of my all time favorite shows on television was Charlie Brooker Screenwipe, a program all about television. Even before I did the foolish thing of going "yeah television sounds great" Charlie was there going "is it though? Is it great? Are you sure?" And painted the dour, realistic look at television. He didn't sugar coat it, some shows are just plain terrible with no intention on being good for society, just as something to air in between commercials for car insurance.

For a good majority of my time online, I wrote much like his screen burn columns in the guardian, and had a few (failed) YouTube series that just stole the snarky asshole gimmick. 

But in today's YouTube landscape, EVERYBODY has an opinion, in fact there is a comment section where you can call people "gay" because they like a cartoon that you  don't. And they come in so many flavors, from angry Republican wanting his 15 minutes of Fame, to the Leftist spitballing Junior year Philosophy as if it's revolutionary.

The truth is, none of us are safe. All of us ARE a commodity, and it's all based on what you click and view. 

If I was to make a video tomorrow called "Analysis: Titans" maybe 12 people would watch it? But if I had a thumbnail of myself looking like I saw some breasts on the cover of one of the thousand "American Pie" movies with the caption "SJW TUMBLR MOB RULE CRINGE FAIL COMPILATION FORTNITE #69" no doubt it might get at least a thousand views. 


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I took this photo while taking a dump. It's no different than maybe 75% of the reactionary thumbnails you see on most YouTube videos catered towards boys 18-24. 

Will I go back to YouTube? 

Maybe. I do not think my place is on YouTube anymore. However, there is this big empty void left in the world because Charlie Brooker is a bit busy making Emmy winning television shows that maybe he can't make it to the phone right now... That I have to leave that message? 

But honestly, it's too little too late. Media analysis is now "Cinema Sins" or groups of people talking about movies so you pretend that you are their friends while watching. 

I'm a guy...  

That's it. 

And no matter what I say, no matter if it's in text, or on video... It will be ignored. 

These companies do not give a shit about you.   They just want to please advertisers. 

Me, I don't know you. But I know I want to figure out what I'm really good at, and seeing, if what baby boomers have told me is true, I could get PAID for it.

But probably not. I'm not really fitting in any one group. So that's a toughie. 

But hey, I got a contact form now... and if I could figure out how to edit on Windows 10 (and my computer won't crap out on me) I could try and do it.

But who knows?

promotionals. 


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I drank this, I don't know if there is caffeine, but it's really good. If I start blabbering on Twitter tonight, this would be the reason. But I do enjoy it. I found it at CVS.

I also have been watching The Price is Right and Let's Make a Deal  on CBS all access. I don't care much for their sitcoms, survivor is "just ok" in my book, but the fact I don't have to be sick from school to watch these shows and it can play on my phone or PS4 is so convenient. I might have to check out the new Star Trek show at this rate!

And finally...  TITANS.  i was thinking of writing a huge wall of text about it, but the truth is, all we got is the pilot. The pilot is ALWAYS bad. But there is some accent breaking with the actors, and it follows all the same tropes as all these DCTV shows (like arrow, flash, etc). It is set in Detroit, yet filmed in Canada... What? I enjoyed all the scenes with Starfire, but the ones involving Raven and even Dick Grayson needed work. Brenton is great in delivering the lines, he is presented as charming and witty, but very protective and introverted, it is the BEST of these live action dctv shows, but it's like picking your favorite "beanboozled flavor" from it's violence for violence sake, to "fuck for the sake of fuck" it's trying to be Daredevil on Netflix, but we know the direction of the show will be more like Riverdale. Expect more shirtless scenes and a love story about Starfire and Robin and the drama of balancing Romance with being a hero that saves the world, much like Oliver and Felicity on Arrow or Barry and Iris on The Flash... It is more of the same. I know I won't get different, but I'll take it. Now please give George Perez credit? 

B- 

October Surprise

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I get to update this again, because that seems like fun. It's 12:35 on October 2nd when I started.

So first off - let's address the sad slump, I think it is a mix of two things. Sleep deprevation and caffeine.  

Sleep deprevation is caused by me on social media watching and binging all sorts of shows and then losing track of time (or in this case, writing an article) 

 Also, the caffeine in coffee and soda has messed with my head for  the longest time. I have to say decades.   

I did not know I was this weak with the stuff, it tastes good, I enjoy root beer floats, so many other things, but it just wasn't right. I couldn't write without hating myself or something else, and I know that isn't me... I had to make a stand and stop. 

I don't know how long until I get back into that, but it seriously effected me and my talent, and I can't do anything right and juggle and panic... 

So I stopped.   

September 24 was the day I had my last soda    and I posted about it on social media

https://www.instagram.com/p/BoH6rJUgYx3/?utm_source=ig_share_sheet&igshid=dw77q7juefzz

 I am not expecting applause, or support, because even though I am trying to work on getting better, I gotta face the fact that I'm NOT an online influencer, or one of these big time YouTube people with hundreds of thousands of views, I know maybe 5 or 6 people might read this, 4 out of love, 1 out of malice, and 1 by accident (sorry guy who came by accident!)

The truth is - that is a struggle in my head, that I don't think will ever go away in terms of figuring out myself and what to do. Because I know I love hosting, writing, creating, comedy and acting... but everything is going online, and spending so much hours online in my teenage through today, I kind of loathe it.

I don't feel like I fit-in anymore, I feel like my job is just to "sell myself" and a lifestyle or brand and career to people, like it's a reality show character, and you have to be flat, one dimensional species. 

I can't do that. 

I get angry at Republicans because they are all morally bankrupt, because to them, it doesn't matter because it's in favor the Cardinal rule of capitalism - those with money, holds all the power (they are playing by the rules, but I find it scummy) 

I get angry at Democrats who see anybody suffering as a "feel good" story to share, but then forget about when the next bad thing happens. What happened to the Pulse Nightclub people? What about NAPL? Does Flint finally have drinking water? There are so many fires, and all I see is "VOTE", well, yeah voting is important, but it comes across like fire fighters periscoping their rescue... It doesn't matter unless you have footage and can "share" it.  You gotta hold for applause when you do that Trump takedown that FINALLY makes morally bankrupt people see "oh yeah I'm in the wrong"

I am simply not happy with any of this, and the quest for joy rests in figuring out ultimately what WOULD make me happy.

Thankfully, after waning off of carbonated sodas aimed at teenagers who love dirtbikes or fortnite, I have gotten way better at stopping myself from just going "you are wasting your time" I might be venty, but I am actually happy!

So here's what happened.   

i had to drop one podcast, I couldn't juggle it anymore, and I had to drop one day of my twitch show, as it also wasn't worth it. The time crunch of editing a podcast or recording, it was making the process not fun, and that SHOULD BE the important part of streaming to be  sharing what I love, so I find that love back.

Fun Time Calls is on ITunes (and others)

My twitch show is fun, so I extended those out to just Monday AND Friday, with the podcast moved to Wednesday, which I actually enjoy, I hope my new plan with these work out. 

But to reiterate - I'm not trying to be a social media star.   

I just think having that small crowd from my discord, and new people joining me here and there, or real life friends seeing what I'm doing and support me that one or two times, that's all I need. 

The problem is, I know that's not good. Unless I'm super talented in something, unless I have the social media klout, nobody would hear from me. That's the sad way of this industry. 

I don't have representation, I don't have an agent, I don't even know what to send on my reel - the twitch show where I talk to Alexa or the podcast where I sigh repeatedly at (really funny) bits and creative ideas my friends come up with... 

It's a feeling of being lost, and yes, a feeling of hopelessness, at least to me, I know I have the talent, but i think it's just luck, mixed with just poor timing that's led me to give up time and time again... 

I just gotta figure out that sense of belonging. 

So that's why I decided to make myself a routine to do EVERY DAY

 

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yes, I could have embed a Twitter link, but I saved it to my phone for memory (it is also pinned) and this is explanation why...

  WATCH 1 GAME SHOW I am so happy to know so many people in the world of game shows, like any field, there are good months and bad months, but even though that struggle is there, I can't, CAN'T, lose my ability to love this genre of television. So rather it's a new UK format (like "Chase the Case"), a new reboot (like "Double Dare") or just an existing show right now (like a "Jeopardy") it's now a need, at least on my creative focus, from the game theory, to set design, to package and casting, I do break it down, and I know that feeling won't go away. (Hey game show friends who might read this, send me a positive message on Facebook sometime)

https://youtu.be/NNFV8QdRa5Q

READ 1 COMIC BOOK    I watched a bunch of taking toons and Rob Paulsen made it seem like voice over is the place to go. I had all these doubts about this, because I am not good at singing, I can't pronounce things correctly sometimes, I don't have a range and break accents as badly as a DCTV series with that good looking model... but then I read Voice-Over Voice Actor by Tara Platt and Yuri Lowenthal. I can't spoil that book, because it goes into detail about everything from auditions to microphones for private studio... but the book did offer one piece of advice - the important part isn't how many different voices you can do, but how you can practice with the ones you can do, even if it's just yourself. 

And you could line-read all you want, I think that's very helpful, but I have been reading PDF scripts since dial-up modems. From South Park to Batman 1989, screenplays were a thing online to find and read, tv shows or movies, it's kind of the fun that got me into screenwriting (over actual creative writing with chapters and essays)

But I figure, reading screenplays, while common, just isn't fun. Especially if it's movies I already know. So I figure the next best thing is comic books, you have multiple characters, faces describe emotion and action, there is narration, and reading it takes a good 20 minutes. (1 page per minute, much like a movie) 

Treat it like a storyboard, and just talk it out, it doesn't matter if I screw up accents, or can't do a good female voice, it's the fun of talking through a comic that makes it so much fun. 

(Hey DC, Quick idea for a format for your streaming service - get voice over actors to read out loud comic books, it's fun!) 

It's better than being a snob with microphones and switchboards, I just want to practice, I am not trying to land a part on Voltron (although hey, I am available 😉) 

 SAY NO TO CAFFEINE i haven't had a soda in a week, I haven't had a coffee or tea either, it was national coffee day on Sunday and I didn't even drink the free coffee drink I got for buying a cupcake. Yeah, I might say no to soda, but I know I need some sugar in my life or else I will crash and burn. Currently, all I have is some fruit punch Gatorade, I'm not doing lacroix, I don't want to burp, I just gotta find a alternative that will work for me, even if it just winds up being chocolate milkshake and orange smoothies or even protein drinks, I just can't handle it. It messed me up, and that's why I just say no.

JUST DO A BIT OF EXERCISE BECAUSE YOU'RE WORTH IT because of dehydration with water, cramping, not feeling focused, I just never got back into my rhythm with exercise, while it would look SUPER NICE to lose a few pounds and gain some muscle mass and abs, I know one thing and that's that it takes time and patience, and some people it's easier for, that much like what I'm doing - just do the fun stuff! Pick up weights and dance with them, do some wiifit, it doesn't matter if I'm not toned, toning comes with time, and if I go back in right now, it could be very dangerous, but hey, if casting needs "a sexy brooding cutie", I will gladly spend a few hours at the gym to fix things, but right now, I need to take care of myself, and I should do just the fun things!

DO SOMETHING NICE I am just sick of assholes trying to exclude women and minorites and queer people in things I enjoy. Rather it's Comic Books, Video Games or Movies. Every day, I browse around the Twitter and Discord. I see so many talented artists and writers, and it doesn't hurt to give them that retweet, or send them a comment letting them know even if it feels like this original project they are making is going nowhere - that it probably has already helped somebody struggling feel comfort that they haven't had. So many assholes trying to grift socially awkward, morally selfish individuals into thinking if it's not a straight white male, it's "feminists taking your toys away". Either thinking "everybody's already equal and now I'm going to be left out" or "it's about me not you, get a new hobby". And time and time again, I do see people hurt, I see people who  are in my shoes. Lacking confidence in themselves to continue drawing, to continue writing that next chapter in a story, because to them "I'm a nobody" or "Nobody wants to see a character that's (insert not-wasp trait here)" and even if it's to chime in to say "you never know unless you try" or simply finding a creator or writer of something you enjoy, and letting them know because of their projects from your childhood, it got you interested in something, you have no idea how much it would make them feel. 

Because, at least in my mind, if we are going to fucking live in a fucking reality show, you might as well come across as one of the "heroes" in the show, even if you get betrayed by a villain so they get ahead, even if you fail every challenge but have a smile on your face, never lose sight on optimism, and pointing out that the villains just want to take every advantage to win, and sometimes, it really is all about making friends. 

So do something nice, even if it's just helping your neighbor or friend get something. Even if they don't thank you, just know that maybe sometime in the near future, some stranger might help you out and change your life for the better! 

PROMOTIONS

I guess VRV got rid of running man, but I have been watching "Talking Toons with Rob Paulsen" I enjoy it still, but I recently just cancelled my subscription, luckily he does have the podcast on audio, and I definitely will just go back to it in December and just binge all 12 episodes I missed in a sitting. 

I also watched on Amazon Prime "DocuMental" a reality game show from Japan where 10 contestants pony up a million yen of their own money to prove they are the funniest person in the room, with one simple rule - you laugh you lose. I didn't know Japanese comedy was just how quickly it could trickle down to gay pornography I would find on PornHub, but sure! It is however very funny at the introspective on how to get comedians, who heard every joke there is, to laugh. 

Giant Bomb has a great new series called Jeff Gerstmann's Pro Skater where Jeff goes through every Tony Hawk game, and it's just so enjoyable to be so nostalgic over a video game I spent weekends playing.

I have been listening to Podcast the Ride, a theme park podcast in the same vein as Doughboys, but with theme park rides, and they have done a daily, 19  part, extremely necessary series talking about the stores, restaurants, and wonderful magic that make up Universal CityWalk Hollywood. There is a sector keeper that's a ghost, they didn't talk about the five towers stage, I think that's bullshit.

Also tonight I watched Cuplicated on Vioobu and I busted out laughing. Some of my favorite people in comedy (and podcasting) appear in this PERFECT satire of streaming services, as well as the trope of comedians doing dramas (complete with nods to Louie and Master of None, and totally didn't predict their awful behavior) . I seriously fell over laughing, the last time that happened was Hidden America with Jonah Ray. Be sure to find "Clip Cup" to find a great satire of clip show comedy shows. It is so fucking good!

And finally,  as much as I just faded out of wrestling, I still find amazing charm, comedy and entertainment when it comes to Bryan and Vinny show   on vimeo. I do not subscribe to the newsletter, I don't use the message board, but this podcast where they talk retro raw, retro wcw, and modern ppvs from New Japan, it just fascinates me, and is the same level of passion and enjoyment that I get from so many of my favorite podcasts. Producer Rob is fantastic and I hope Bryan Alvarez pays him enough from his gold boat that he can have a gold Sea-Doo, or maybe at the very least, a gold boogie board!

Now if you excuse me, I have to figure out why I still sweat too much before bedtime (and no, it's not honking one out) 

 

Have a Good Summer

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hi friends, it's been a while, it's time for another update, I gotta do something with this more often.

anyway, night night in twitch has a cool set, I enjoy making it, however, i find myself fearful my computer might crash and that might end the run. I like the look and feel, but the problem is the last few weeks had no real news stories to discuss just videos to watch, and I just don't want this twitch show to be pinned down, if it gets political and talks about awful people trying to get diverse voices out of hobbies that have created consumer identities, or if it's just a fun loving show where I get excited about ice cream, who knows?  but I want to keep that going, but I might do Monday and Friday, but Wednesday was meant for catch up, so who knows? I hope you all like it, please use your twitch sub on me, I hope to be myself still.

Because the last two are the real juggles, kirbysclubhouse, while fun because I can get a bit more political and in depth of the game and nerdy stuff, I did it originally because I wanted something that had guests and friends talking and it would always rotate, but I'm finding fatigue most in something that takes the less amount of effort, maybe it is good to find a different date? Maybe something else eentirely.

The other podcast, fun time calls, is probably my favorite thing, it's me, and my friends Ian and Jack and it becomes a surreal show that's part bits, part fast conversation, and it just feels chaotic yet enjoyable... my problem stems with editing the show as I input sound effects and sometimes pull bad jokes or insert sfx and other jokes. It takes hours to make, but it seems like I don't advertise it that much... It's on iTunes! Check it out! 

 outside of internet stuff...

I finished Spider-Man for PS4, and it's a really good video game. I think it's the best Spiderman game by far, but some of my problems with Arkham Games are still in this, including my hate of stealth and jump scares. But I got Spiderman in their underwear on Avengers tower so that was really good!

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the other thing I did was start watching VRV, I signed up a day BEFORE the announcement of 90s Nick shows showing up, and fell in love. Not only is it home to some of my favorite seeso shows (Hidden America, MY BROTHER MY BROTHER AND ME) but also some crunchy roll stuff (dragon ball super, Yuri on ice) and also I got a couple shows I watched and enjoy and felt the need to give them a great shout out, because I could!

  Hardcore Tabletop  by Rooster Teeth is very good, I only knew rooster teeth over a decade ago as a fan of Red vs Blue, but I barely know any of the people on the show, or the references, but the presentation is what sells it, as it's comedic yet also played like a high stakes game of Monopoly (as they play with real money, and there is a jail under the table) it's really really good, it makes me understand a bit of YouTube culture and wanting to "be with your friends on the internet"

Talking Toons with Rob Paulsen       from Nerdist is also on VRV and it's the most fascinating talk show as the guests themselves are voice over artists talking about the trade, how they got involved and the projects they love and the business they enjoy, Rob is very delightful, with plenty of stories from his decades in voice acting, and seeing the variations, from video games to anime to online content and the classic and modern cartoons you know and love. You get to appreciate what it takes in the industry (and he was successfully able to sell me into a few books here and there for my own selfish reasons)

Running Man is the last show to discuss, it comes from DramaFever, and it's a fascinating Korean "variety show" that is tough to describe except as "never-ending game show" each episode has a new game featuring celebrity guests, crazy outcomes and hilarious moments that could only be a cross between "Impractical Jokers" with the reactions and punishments and the ensemble cast and a game show like "The Amazing Race" with a new location every episode. The fact the show hasn't ended yet speaks volumes to the shows success and translates amazingly for Western viewers here in America. I assure you, if you love things like taskmaster, you would enjoy this game show!

Now I gotta go sleepy time! 

FUN TIME CALLS?


So, I decided to make a podcast on the internet again. I do not know if this is good or not, but I thought it was funny. I hope you enjoy this podcast that has a name, I think it is called "Fun Time Calls", there is no prank calls on this podcast, but I think the fun comes from the discussions in the calls, because that's why it's called fun time calls.

Also, I don't like skittles. I like sour skittles more.

DOWNLOAD THE PODCAST HERE

OR SCROLL DOWN AND ADD THE RSS TO YOUR PHONE

 

 

LET'S UPDATE AGAIN

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So, let's do some updating! 

 As you can see, webcomic is now here. I'm gonna do that sparringly, because Microsoft Paint is wonky.

Also, I do a show called NIGHT NIGHT that's on MONDAY, WEDNESDAY and FRIDAY around 8pm PST.

 We look at internet stuff, watch YouTube videos, analyse game shows and more.

 I paid money for this background!

Twitch.TV/JordanGames

That's the place to find it, subscribe and also I'm trying to get a discord going because that's what all the cool people are doing now.

But I'm trying to set a limit to keep out any bad eggs. 

 THIS IS WHERE TO GO TO HELP ME OUT

I want to update this more. But honestly, there isn't much that I haven't been saying on Night Night. 

I don't care about E3 anymore because it's just celebrating commercials for things to buy. 

But that being said I did scribble down some of my favorite games from E3

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I pre-ordered most of them, others like Yakuza Kiwami 2 I already pre-ordered before E3... 

Here are a few bullet point notes as well

  • As much as I'm excited about double dare being revived, I am concerned the production was rushed and it came across as cheap. 
  • I've been binging on chapo trap house, and I think it's a very good Podcast in how they present the news and call bullshit to all the grifters
  • Quick food review - Yoshinoya is 2 out of 5 stars
  • Ready Player One is bad. Painfully bad. I like nerdy stuff, but it feels creatively bankrupt, and the sort of movie that would enable Funko Pop collectors and crypto mining. If it's 2045, why get nostalgic about 80s and 90s stuff? If it's "because we need the data for this Easter egg game", what if you don't care about this online game? What happened afterwards? Where is the 2020s, 2030s and 2040s nostalgia then? Should people get excited for North West?
  • Abolish ICE

quick update

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So, it's time for a quick update but here it goes...

 Night Night is doing great, I think I found the niche for the show, as I am trying to get a good rhythm. It's on twitch, the problem with stream is still the computer.

I updated my website to be just the blog, the about and "webcomic", webcomic the webcomic is something I've been doing on and off for nearly a decade, but I figured crude drawings and walls of text would make for something different so here you go. 

I also pulled the idea vault and portfolio, because those are pretty much for my eyes only or employers. But because nothing is happening right now, I'm just going to assume I'm bad for business. 

So now I'm trying to figure out how to fix that. If I have a podcast what would it be about? Should I do it fast or slow? I don't know what it should be even about. Would anybody even listen? Probably not. 

i was thinking about something recently. And it's going to be weird... but follow me on this  children's broadcasting.

I've been watching old Bill Nye and Nick News, and these shows got kids interested in science and current events and brought it down to a level for them to understand. 

Most parents just give their kids a iPhone and YouTube and expect Spiderman and Elsa doing the Harlem shake to babysit them, but the problem tests in auto play and it gets awful. 

I understand kids love PewDiePie and let's plays, but I'm finding it more fascinating looking at "today I found out", or "William Osman" and other people who just show their fascinations with things... That sense of Discovery. 

Last year, kids love slime videos, but rarely did anybody explain the chemistry that goes into creating non-newtonian fluid.

And sorry, but trying to find the videos usually leads to awful people who dislike any sort of social justice or progress... Which in my mind, defeats why we learn and grow and develop. 

Are there any good resources to get kids to know about STEM? What about the arts and humanities? is there somebody that can explain climate change? What does it mean to be Muslim? What did transgender mean? 

Mister Rogers taught us to love ourselves, and we are special by just being ourselves... But I don't see that today. 

I think that person is out there, but I doubt it could be me. Because I do have a very foul mouth. 

But I have a background in TV, I almost got all my education credits while in school. I could try. 

The simplest of things like algebra or the electoral college or scary things like divorce and death. 

Some say it's unnecessary, but I'm starting to be skeptical and think it's necessary now more than ever.

Here's to you Linda, Bill and Fred. 

I gotta confess

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I don't normally vent here. But this is my website and I need to update it with SOMETHING. But lately, I've just been riding the wave, basically torn between production and writing and being just another person ranting about stuff on the internet.

 But one thing that's been stuck in my head, is that of reality television. I enjoy an "amazing race" and think "big brother" is the training wheels to get game show fans into reality competition.

But I haven't really said something that would get me pretty much blacklisted from every production house  I hate confessionals.

If you don't know what a confessional is, basically since the dawn of reality television with shows like "the real world" there have been "the confessional", where a character (because in the world of reality TV, they aren't human, they are characters) give their "honest thoughts" on the subject.

On reality competition, it's strategy and game plan, or the crappier "explain what's going on right in front of you" (so-and-so and I are hanging on to a bar for as long as possible) 

And some game shows, like Weakest Link or divided use them as well to show conflict... 

And the worst abuser of them all, is documentary. The kind of garbage you see like House hunters, to The Kardashian show of the week, to the one with dating people. 

It's horrendous. But mostly, at least to me, they only serve one thing - the producers. 

The producers already recorded all this footage of people in a game or eating dinner or something. Then they need to have "conflict" to have an episode. 

So, given all these hours of footage, they chop together stuff to make something sound coherent. 

Maybe so and so had a dinner conversation about wanting a dog, and somebody didn't want a dog that a perfect time to then a few weeks later get them into a green screen studio or a couch and have them say lines like "I want a dog, here's why" and "I don't want a dog, here's why" and then try and create a story about the compromise, maybe get footage at a rescue shelter, maybe show the guy angry stepping in dog shit, that's what we get. 


And honestly, I'm pretty sure at this point, audiences don't even believe these confessionals anymore. They are either staged to get the players to say what is necessary, or it's just rambling nonsense that's equatable to somebody angry on YouTube that Cartoon Network isn't the same as it was when they were a kid (this is a evergreen opinion, because CHILDHOOD vs KIDS THESE DAYS)

But the confessional, it's ANNOYING to me, it's ANNOYING on shows like The Office and Modern Family, it's ANNOYING when game shows try to do that to get some sort of sob story. 

It's just annoying. 

All it is, at least to me, is duct tape for a show to get something together. The same way when you see a documentary have just a talking head say something instead of showing it off. 

I am a firm believer in show not tell, and the confessional is pure tell.

An interview with people is fine if it's outside the boundary of the show. But it always feels pieced together in a way that makes it seem like we need a hero and a villain and a conflict.

Is this our future? Are we going to have confessionals on Wheel of Fortune?  People explaining why they bought a vowel? 

It's an instant turn off for me, and sometimes it pains me to see that used more and more in shows. I don't even like it on Bake-Off. 

I understand you want points of view and it helps in that regard, but it takes me immediately away from the action on screen. 

If you're going to tell me, it better be things the producers can't obtain or recreate.  

It's things like the confessional, that make me less motivated to be in this weird industry. 

I'm going to drink a coffee while somebody either says Something positive about me, something because about me or it's me talking about drinking the damn coffee that you clearly see.

Get rid of it, it's unnecessary.

Talking Taskmaster

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As you know, game shows are sort of "my thing", the same way Nightwing is, or hamburgers, or awkward video game moments... Okay I might need to trim some of these down.

So I was excited to find out that Taskmaster, a popular (600,000 viewers on DAVE!) game show is coming to the US! 

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 The show is split into two segments - on location and in studio.

 On each season (or series) 5 contestants, all of which are famous in the world of entertainment (mostly comedy, in various forms) are given a multitude of tasks (challenges) to compete with a time limit.

Some are straight forward like "find alex the fastest" (Alex is the Creator of the show, and in this show plays assistant and umpire, and data person)   to something that could require creativity ("Eat this egg the fastest") to ones that involve creativity ("create a movie that would look really cool in slow motion") 

After they were filmed and edited, they are all taken in studio, where they meet the Taskmaster for the first time, (Greg Davies, AND YOU WILL OBEY HIM, or not, he's pretty friendly actually) 

It is there they find out what they are played for in "the prize task", something each contestant brings in that fits a criteria (Recently: "best liquid", previously: "hippest headwear" "important document") to which Taskmaster ranks from best to worst for points (5/4/3/2/1) 

Then, one of the tasks are shown, sometimes split up by person, sometimes grouped up (sometimes in teams) as they look back at what they did, what strategies they were done, and if anybody broke the rules.

Concluding with a "Live Task" that all 5 compete in that's in studio (usually 100 seconds) with whoever scoring the most points that episode winning the 5 items from the prize task! 

  (In the event of a tie, a tiebreaker task is shown quickly)

The points are banked with the highest scorer of points throughout all the episodes winning the real grand prize - the Taskmaster Trophy (a bust of the Taskmaster) 

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What makes the show work so well is the diversity in the casting, mixed with the budget, it's cheap!

But while on other game shows, cheapness is met with distain, Taskmaster uses it to their advantage, as anybody could theoretically get the same items at home and play the same challenges! (Without the scorn of Greg of course) 

There is lateral thinking in this show, where if the task involved limitations like "you may not touch the item", you could instruct Alex or a production assistant to touch the item for you. Or if they paid attention to the room, there could have been bonus points or loss of points, and that's rarely shown on television.

 So it's fun for me to come up with ideas for tasks on the show.

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And it's fun to watch how others go through these challenges, some are just bad, others amazing, and you get everything in between.

Taskmaster is in its 6th season in the UK, and is currently airing.

I recommend watching this show for the mix of discussions and the tasks. 

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Which leaves me to Taskmaster USA. A slightly truncated version of the game show, instead of 44 minutes, it runs 22 minutes, and only enough time to get through 2 video tasks and a live task.

Is it good? Is it bad? It's really whatever. 

There is no prize task anymore, instead one contestant out of the five brings in "something they don't want to lose" and it's a game of personal possessions. 

I'm going to say this WHENEVER PERSONAL POSSESSIONS ARE EVER USED IN A GAME SHOW, IT IS GUARANTEED TO GET CANCELLED

American audiences do not like seeing their stuff played for, they like to win, not lose, and even if it's played for laughs, never works out. Just look at FOX's BIG DEAL, MTV's TRASHED, or ABC's DOWNFALL if you need to know why. 

It sounds like during a pitch about this show - somebody brought up the prize task as "they bring in their own possessions" unaware that more often, they just buy something that is silly enough to fit a criteria for a joke. ("Bring in the most money" with foreign money or play money) 

It honestly should just be scrapped altogether, but if you needed "stakes" I guess that works? 

While it is only two tasks, they seem to break it into two types - a "rank" task (best wins) and a fastest/most task. 

Unlike Greg,  Reggie Watts does not play "authoritarian", but rather a heightened version of himself, he's regal, but with his judgements, he critiques as somebody who is an expert on creativity, almost like a cross between a Television Executive and the viewer at home wondering why they went a certain way. 

And I will say it - he is splendid as Taskmaster, he is somebody you enjoy as a leader and authority figure, even if some of the calls you might disagree with. And it is pretty American.

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Which one is better? I would say the UK version, solely because of the hour long time limit.

Making it half the time, speeds up the tasks and you lose the banter and debate of the UK edition that makes it great.

The prize task, to me, is a quick insight on the contestants if you're new to the show, as you figure out their thoughts on simple suggestions., a lack of it, takes the fun out of it.

If you were going to do a new season of this and it needed to be half an hour, I would eliminate a prize task, with an actual "prize task" .

Before the game, each player suggested 4 things they want if they won (a vacation, a new car, etc)

And then each of those are sent to one of the opponents, (and predetermined on the show) 

So the final task isn't a live task, but a contestant seeing their prize task. (A contestant opens the envelope to see "present the winner with immortality in studio, you  have one month") to then the prize is revealed, even if it's slightly corrupted.

That's not to say it's bad, HOWEVER. given they put it on Friday Nights at 11 o'clock in back to back episodes, it sounds like they are burning off the show and giving it a fast cancellation. 

Which is slightly upsetting, but as long as it's still around on Dave, there isn't any hope lost!

 I'll leave you now with this task.

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I'm Broke.

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Okay, that's a very misleading headline. If that came across as clickbait, I'm sorry. 

 I make "an ok amount" of money, i have enough to get by, but when it comes to economics, I don't think I have as much of a disposable income as others.

And that's what today's subject is about - disposable income.  As technology changes we have so many subscription services that PER MONTH, you get stuff, physical or not.

You might have heard some of these from time to time, as they are podcast sponsors.

Netflix, Hulu Plus, WWE Network, Crunchyroll, YouTube Red, Amazon Prime, and soon, stuff from Disney and DC Comics

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And that's not including any of the subscription box services, that just involve some variation of "a shirt and a Funko" 

But it's getting out of control, and because I like to be honest, I am going to tell you, the reader, all my subscriptions! 

Cable Subscription - Spectrum   (With HBO and showtime)   

Because as much as I would love to cut the cord, I'm a firm believer that we might see a new television Renaissance real soon, as cable TV gave us niche, and internet gave us whatever you wanted, you're going to see Television, almost turn into a Twitch style with tons of live programming and more revivals of shows you vaguely remember.

Netflix 

It seems every day, they have something new, and they rotate out the content that isn't their own, but they gave a platform to the new Mystery Science Theater, they have Arrested Development, and if I wanted to, I could watch a couple movie classics.

They also have The Joel McHale Show with Joel McHale, so I have to subscribe, now somebody can watch weird Television with me! 

Hulu   

This one might be on my unsubscribe list soon, as the last thing I saw was the documentary on The Dana Carvy show, and they really have nothing I watch.

Reality Shows aren't game shows, my friend. And I hate confessionals way more than you think.   It's ticky-tacky for editors to create a story out of nothing. AND I MIGHT WANT TO VENT ON THAT SOON

Patreon 

I don't have a Patreon myself, I thought about it, but I honestly don't know what to put up that makes it "worth it", a podcast? More articles? I don't know!  But if you have any ideas, send them to me on patreon. Let me know what you enjoy.

But for me, I think Patreon is the place to go for content creators, so I dropped a few dollars to Bob Mackey and Henry Gilbert's "What a Cartoon" and "Talking Simpsons" podcasts

Because as I said earlier - I really love when people share their love of stuff with the world, and I think they deserve the love as well. The episode about Steven Universe is really good (as Henry talks about a personal connection with the show) 

And Two Bad Neighbors episode of The Simpsons, where Bob chats with a couple people from Chapo about politics that make it hilarious! 

 I would love to donate to more people, and unfortunately this is why I get frustrated sometimes. I want to help so many people, but man, I could barely afford a $60 at launch these days!

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F4W Video 

So I recently unsubscribed to the WWE Network, because it's mostly terrible. I usually just subscribe from Royal Rumble through WrestleMania (about 3 months) and move on afterwards.

But my guilty pleasure show has to be The Bryan and Vinny Show on Figure 4 Weekly

Originally, an audio podcast, they have moved into video, where now you can see facial reactions to their recap of pay per views, speaking out of experience, and in entertainment.  

Every week, they have 3 episodes:   Retro Raw and Nitro (from "the 90s", and spoilers - it's terrible!) With their funny friend Craig! A modern episode of NXT (WITH GRANNY!) and a Sunday Grabbag, that is either an 80s WCW show or the most recent pay per view event.

Giant Bomb

Giant Bomb has been the first subscription service I've used, I love Unprofessional Fridays as a show, but the video game content at Giant Bomb remains my favorite.

I don't really watch that many "let's plays" or twitch streamers, but something about building a robot in Nintendo Labo, Garfield Video Games, 50 Turn Mario Party Match-Ups and Killing each other in The Sims 4, that just makes it exciting! 

The guy who got married at a Taco Bell and the White Guy from The Blinking White Guy meme went though all the Metal Gear Solid games!

Amazon Prime

When it comes down to it, I'm happy with the shipping, and the bonus of a place where I could watch all the star wars movies. 

I enjoy all the snack of the month ideas, but ultimately, I like being in control of my destiny, and I choose what dumb stuff I want to buy. 

I liked Nick Box, but everything was plushes, which are cheap to make

I liked loot crate, but it felt like I wasn't getting my money's worth (or what if I don't care for Harry Potter?) 

Ultimately, I'm happy just pre-ordering stuff, ignoring it until it shows up to my doorstep and I get surprised. 

   AM I SAYING IT'S TOO MUCH?

Yes and No, excluding cable, and you are looking at about $900 a year  (hey, $10 a month at 12 months is $120, give or take)

Additionally, while I love video games, I'm getting annoyed by DLC, lootcrates and ways video games just can't come up with a proper ending (this includes sequels)

But much like confessionals, I'm saving "say goodbye" for a later date. 

But it seems that is a new business tactic, movie pass did well, but now they are pulling the strings to make sure you don't take advantage (4 a month!) 

GameStop was going to have a rental service, but that seems to be missing... 

And all I have to figure out is. 

"Ah damn it, I forgot Xbox Live and PLAYSTATION plus, oh well, no going back to edit that list now" 

This is the new way of business, some companies want you there as long as possible (Netflix) while others want to make sure you forget they exist and collect per month (Hulu) 

Others want to disappoint you, or surprise you. 

But ultimately, if you think it's worth it, then go for it! 

But I'm just a bit weary about what this means in, everything. 

Is it capitalism? Is it silicon valley? I don't know. 

No Video Games Here

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It's snacktacular Jordan here, reminding you that chips have a high sodium content that could lead to dehydration - so drink plenty of water!

I haven't updated this blog in a few weeks because I barely had much to talk about. Nothing new happened. No new movies no new video games, I've just been watching YouTube videos and trying to get sleep.

While I see the benefit of this blue filter night light, it hasn't done much on assisting me in getting more sleep. A real struggle recently is coming up with a nice sleep pattern, which hasn't been achievable.

The most recent video game I played was Kirby Star Allies, which I will say is "alright", on my current financials, I have roughly $100 to spend on entertainment (if we deduct Netflix and all that, it's about $60) . Which means I could just about buy ONE video game a month.

 Yakuza 6 looks very fun, as does the most recent God of War, but my computer is very laggy and I might just need to save up, so I could get better equipment for writing or making games.

But right now, E3 is looking and that means  hyping everything until you lose interest 

And I dislike it, it should also be the time to watch movies like Avengers : Weekend At Thanos or Deadpool 2, either way it has Josh Brolin.

 But instead, I'm just in a wormhole.

I'm watching The Crystal Maze and Theme Park YouTube. 

 

Most of you already know The Crystal Maze is one of my favorite game shows from the UK. It incorporates this fantasy style of game show that's like a game of Dungeons and Dragons, mixed with quick activities that are speedy.

Completing challenges warn the mcguffin , Failing earn nothing, but taking too long, and you could lose that mcguffin.

It could be trivia, it could be a skill based show, or just a basic physical challenge, or a simple puzzle, the variety makes it great. And it's one show I wouldn't mind coming over here. 

They recently received the show in the UK, although more formatted as the host/producers determine the games, and there is a limit of just 10 games (2 per player, up to 2/3/3/2 in the four zones) that makes the game feel slow and treats it like a game show that nobody wanted to participate in, which in turn makes it so the audience should have no investment in.  

Even if the stakes are low, a good host can make everybody seem invested in  the game. Richard O'Brien is great at this, because even if a contestant is doing badly, he is entertaining you into continuing.

It's an absolute delight and I would probably spend more time on this, because imagine a Wild West,  Space, Dock/Warehouse and the classical Medieval to expand the world.

It's a show I'm just binging on. 

 

Also, I've been really enjoying that of Theme Park YouTube. I finished up the Defunctland series and each episode is self contained to tell a story of a new Attraction at the theme park, the creation, the launch and eventually, it's failure. What worked and didn't work with a bit of humor, like the idea of Pleasure Island having "A Magical TGI Friday's"

If it's one thing I enjoy on YouTube, it's people making videos with knowledge and passion, and theme park YouTube comes from this pure love of attractions, and it's just something that is missing in this world. 

As I said in an earlier post, the way to fight all this negative and hate is with positivity, and even though we are looking at shortcomings and failures, each episode is coming from a place of admiration, rather than spite!

You could find various videos from other people enjoying their theme park day and sharing it on YouTube

One such channel is that of Magic Journeys that goes through all the food at Disneyland (and Walt Disney World) and while the average person will go "wait, a churro is HOW MUCH", they aren't seeing the theme park in rose (gold) colored glasses, and if something is just not up to par, they will tell you.

These people do Disney, pretty much how I would do Disney, and it makes me happy seeing videos like this. Not because "hey I'm not alone in my weird antics" but also because these come from a place of love.

WE NEED MORE HAPPY VIDEOS PLEASE. 

I'm still hoping something good happens here soon, but "nothing much" so far.

I might not do much on the internet these days, but man it's so much fun seeing what others are doing. 

I was also in the most recent "I'd Rather Not" podcast, which you could listen here

  If you have any questions, feel free to ask over at:

curiouscat.me/JJordanHass

I now leave you with me holding an ice cream

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Weekend Ideas

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I'm not going to promote this post, but this weekend I'm probably going to just go to Salt and Straw and finally try some fun flavors. I haven't been but wish me luck!

 I spent the last few days messing around with a few image editing apps and did some pretty bad memes (which you could see from the image above)

The slump is kicking in again where i do feel like I'm running out of ideas and when that happens, I panic, so that means I'm going to try something new, and I think that's why I did that. 

Also, please look at Ballotpedia.org so you can make an informed choice at the ballot box. 

I should probably see The Last Jedi or Ready Player One or Love, Simon among other movies, there is a huge backlog for me.

Ugghhhhhh! 

 

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also, should I actually go to Denny's and try these items? It seems silly, but something I would do, as I do enjoy Han Solo, and I am kinda sorta looking forward to his movie.

But right now, my brain feels melty, and I am watching what I missed at WrestleMania because of a stomach flu...  

But I think something good is going to happen soon, I just don't know when or what! 

Lost on the Internet

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So, it's been a weird few weeks. I have had a stomach flu, I've been having sad slumps, and trying to figure out what to do next.

Currently, I've been twitch streaming, but I don't know how long I can keep that up, which I know is important. I think it's boring, I don't have much to bounce off of, and my computer is lagging a bit even on loading websites. 

The less I get involved online, the less I know the current events. But recently, I saw drama unfold with something I'm familiar with. In 2011, I had a website that sad pretty mean things about a few internet reviews, at the time, I didn't know any better, I was REALLY DEPRESSED, friends went away, I didn't know how to deal with bisexuality, and I messed up. .. I barely spoke about it, except in passing, because I was embarrassed by the content and language.  But recently, a bunch of content creators came forward with problems they had with the website, some left years ago, others as recent as today.  But I didn't know what to do. I felt that other times, it wasn't right, but this time, because it was more personal, and people I've grown to know as friends were in situations that I couldn't believe we're happening even back when I was a jerk.  I have to apologize to all those I messed with in my past, and I would like to believe I've gotten better, but this event is really my ultimate test. .. and so far, all I could do is say these content creators deserved better! I wish I had the power to make a better website to fix this, to make sure the content creators had a place to promote their Patreon and entertaining reviews and retrospectives and just factual videos among other things. But, ultimately, I know all I could do is sit in the sidelines and tell jokes with the actual people that should matter - these victims.  I know I can not reverse the actions of myself from almost a decade ago, but I do know I can be a better person by hearing them out, sharing their content and actually caring.

If it's one thing that's missing not just online, but in the real world - it's people lacking empathy.

We do not care about our neighbor anymore, we have decided being selfish is all that matters, and if I screw you over - it's your fault, not mine.  

I think we need to show kindness, we need to show positivity, even though things might look bad, I think the way to fight all this evil, all the garbage, is simple WITH LOVE 

It's so easy to say things are bad or terrible or sucks... But it's more rewarding to fight that with positive, things that are good. 

Looking at these content creators now - it's no longer "fuck this piece of shit" and somebody having a fake meltdown, it's people showing stuff they love, even if it's quirky, out of their own interests. 

But that's the secret - love and passion for their hobby. Not "identify by my hobby" and see things as threats, but being welcoming to New ideas, or crazy ideas, and even if they flop, what made them interesting in the first place! 

I'm this weird theory I have if you give love, you will get love back.

This means, it's perfectly okay to shout into the void, because most likely, in this big internet that we talk with, you'll find somebody that loves that thing as much as you do... And have friends!  

And it doesn't have to be a big major thing like Sonic the Hedgehog or something obscure as Mario Party. 

I honestly didn't know there was a Game Show fanbase until i had the internet. No matter how obscure, there is somebody there. 

And if there isn't, I know if you post about it, somebody will find that fascinating. 

Everybody has an interest, the secret is to not let it be your identity, and not let it over take you that you need to gatekeep who "isn't a true fan" and who "is killing video games".

I think there are people who haven't quite figured that out yet, and just sit on the sideline and wait til somebody on YouTube "destroys" that person, they want to be passive or stay in the center...

But those people, are quite boring, and most likely are your typical edgelord contrarian looking to capitalize on the popular thing, by saying, maybe it's bad???

You had a harassment campaign a few years back where people gatekeep people's opinions on games (turns out people hate it when you speak about progressive ideology like "body positivity" or "queer protagonists")  and if you are a developer making a game with such things, you are "shoving it in our throats" which is crazy hyperbole, because nobody is forced to play anything...

And this continued with comic books, where they harass women who work at marvel, or when comic books provide storylines that -gasp- are political! And not just political - PROGRESSIVE! 

And at no point, did somebody wonder why they like comic books in the first place? Why instead of trying to ruin something that gives people of color inspiration (like black panther) they look at the books they do enjoy? (I'm guessing it's Frank Miller?) Nobody is taking away that past, you can't get in a time machine and make the 1990s WWF Attitude Era go away.

If you hate the modern WWE for having somebody like Finn Balor promote something like acceptance for LGBTQ+, you can rewatch the same five minutes of triple h telling the godfather's to "suck it" , because that's what you love... 

Focus on the stuff you love and get rid of the hate, and life will be better.

You don't need to spite somebody to get that "checkmate", you just need to celebrate the stuff you love. 

There wouldn't be a High Times magazine if somebody wasn't interested in it. 

There wouldn't be unboxing videos on YouTube if someone didn't enjoy the unknown. 

Speaking from experience, there is no joy in harming others, it only makes you feel good temporarily, but eventually you either lose all remorse, or you figure out that  that's not you. 

So if this becomes a website where I write about Nightwing or Game Shows or Board Games, then do be it.

Because it's better to do something out of love, than ever out of petty. 

And I hope you join me for the ride, or at the very least, this fast article.

The Black Velvet Cupcake

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I really miss the Black Velvet Cupcake at Sprinkles. It was chocolate on chocolate and it was really good. I wish I had one on my birthday. But I think it will be back for Halloween.  It's my favorite cupcakes.